“By definition, rejection is a two edged sword. It can come into a person when that person is rejected (denied love and acceptance) and it can cause as much damage even when the person perceives that they are being rejected. The rejection is real to him, regardless if it is real or not. Rejection can also come out of a person when they refuse to agree to, submit to, or believe an established norm. i.e. rebellion, stubborness, or refusal to believe truth” (Null, 1996)
How does this affect those who have been on either side of that sword? Well, rejection is the root of all other heart issues. It causes fear and pride. A person who accepts rejection with acceptance will experience fear. If he refuses the rejection then pride enters. All fruit of rejection is classified as works of the flesh.
How did this affect me? I felt rejected most of my life. As a little girl, I was the only blonde haired person in my family. Not to mention that my mother told me that I was “the milkman’s daughter” on various occasions, especially when she was introducing me to friends that would stop over. When you are 3, if your mother tells other people, you are the milkman’s daughter you tend to start asking questions to yourself. Was it true? “No” it wasn’t. The enemy tended to use my mother a lot as I was growing up. She always made comments about how different I was from the rest of my siblings. She was not an affectionate individual and this too played into the rejection card. She had a hard time showing love and receiving love. This is hard for a little girl who needs the real unconditional love of her mother. I always felt different in my family, as if there was something different about me. I felt like a round peg in a square hole. Rejection allows the enemy to set up camp in you if you allow it to. It’s like a huge open door for the enemy to bring all of his friends. Satan tells you that you have every right to feel anger and hatred for the wrong that has been done to you, God says, let me use it to teach you humbleness. This is what happened to me. Just as God allowed Saul to feel rejection, Saul used it to turn his heart against David for fear that he would take Saul’s place as king, to the point where he wanted to kill him. If Saul would have just repented, things would have been different for him. God uses judgement and rejection to delete pride out of us. Saul was chosen because of his humility and rejected because of his pride.
It enabled me to see that God allowed all of the rejection in my life to bring me to the point that I buckled under the weight of it. Whether I had received rejection by my mother’s comments, or I refused the truth and lived by my own standards, it brought me to the same conclusion. Apart from the Lord, I could not do anything. I couldn’t remove it by myself and I couldn’t be saved unless He saved me. With the Holy Spirit breaking my heart, drawing me to the Cross it produced Godly sorrow for doing things my own way for all of those years. With my heart turned, I repented and God saved me.
If you are in bondage to rejection, we can help you. Call 518-477-5759