There are four(4) basic personality types: the leader, the thinker, the feeler and the worker. Most people are of one type, some are of two types. Even rarer are those who are a blend of all 4 types. Jesus as a man was all 4 types, perfectly blended. Narcissists exist in all 4 categories. Even though they seek control in relationships, not all narcissists are leaders. As thinkers, they have a running stream of consciousness that centers over his own self-absorption regarding his failures and successes, while others are delusional in order to escape a flood of negative feelings and emotions.
In each case, an alienation from the true self is often disguised by a false religiosity. Furthermore, as pride goes before a fall, the conflict centers within the narcissist’s pride system. At times, he may experience himself as a superior human being and at other times as his despised self. When these two ways of experiencing himself operate at the same time, the client will feel like two people pulling in opposite directions. This conflict could be of sufficient impact to tear anyone apart.
Usually, if the inner conflict is intense, the narcissist will automatically seek solutions to alleviate the tension. The role of deliverance is to find the true self, because very often a demon or demons have so infiltrated the client’s personality that the demon involved is well hidden by lies and deception. As Jesus said “the truth shall set you free.”
Therefore, deliverance counseling and coaching are always directed toward uncovering truth, not only in uncovering the true meaning of life’s apparently insignificant messages, but also in exorcising the demonic influence from the client’s personality. Those who are frustrated in their personality type will manifest some of the following traits.
In this solution, the narcissist glorifies and cultivates in himself everything that means mastery. Religiosity and charismatic witchcraft play a significant role. Mastery with regard to others entails the need to excel and to be superior in some way. The narcissist tends to manipulate or dominate others and to make them dependent upon him. This solution is also reflected in what he expects the attitude of others toward him ought to be. Whether he is out for adoration, respect or recognition or the 3 P’s of power, position and prominence, he is concerned with others subordinating and humbling themselves to him and looking up to him. He resists the idea of his being compliant, appeasing or dependent.
The solution of mastery includes the narcissist’s striving to accomplish and achieve. Helplessness may make him feel panicky and he hates any trace of weakness or insufficiency within himself.
THE SELF ABASEMENT SOLUTION: Victim’s to the NARC
This solution can be seen among those in Christendom who tends to subordinate themselves to others so as to prove by their behavior that they are “suffering for Jesus.” Such a person will fight any inward feeling of being superior to others to such an extent that he is often overlooked both in the world and in the church. This is that one who would hide his talent in the sand, with all kinds of excuses for not using it. He is uneasy when he receives any admiration or recognition, as he rejects being put in a superior position. this kind of personality is food for the narcissist.
. What the victim longs for is help, protection and surrendering love. In his attitude toward himself, the victim lives with a sense of failure to measure up to his own personal “ought to’s” , the “ought to’s” of others as well as biblical precepts and mandates. He tends to feel guilty, inferior, or contemptible. Passivity, a doorway for demons, becomes his solution, where others are either accusing or despising him and he can find no fault in his own behavior. Although self pride is not consciously felt, the victim becomes proud in secretly belittling others for not being as forgiving, understanding and as “humble” as he is—ie, for being self centered and selfish in comparison to his self effacing ways. Pride will also manifest in the opposite direction, where the victim will secretly admire pride and aggressiveness in the narcissist, and thereby passively submit to being dominated and controlled by self seeking people. Therefore, the need for company is all the greater since being alone becomes a pride issue—proof that he is unwanted and unpopular and is therefore a disgrace, to be kept a secret.
Therefore, those who belittle themselves are usually not very discriminating where it comes to their relationships. As a rule, he will not be able to recognize the difference between genuine friendliness and its many counterfeits. He is too easily manipulated by any perceived show of warmth or interest that the narcissist may appear to offer. The victim looks through rose colored glasses by upholding his inner dictates that tell him that he should like everybody, and that he should not be suspicious.Furthermore, antagonism and possible fights cause the victim to overlook, discard, minimize or explain away such traits as lying, crookedness, exploitation, cruelty and treachery. Religious Christians find solutions to not facing such realities by claiming that they must “always walk in love.” Their definition of love is often connected to suffering abuse in relationships, making them vulnerable to demonic soul ties and co-dependent relationships. Simply put, he personality type of the victim that seeks this particular self effacing solution makes for a greater subjective feeling of unhappiness and depression than the others. The genuine suffering of this solution causes the victim to feel most miserable because of his commitment to suffering. In this sense, his concept of love is the only thing that gives a positive content to his life.
THE SOUL’S BONDAGE
For various reasons, the soul’s resistance to the truth is the result of the both the narcissist and his victim’s development over time of an intricate subliminal strategy that will hinder his ability to face his problems “head on.” Therefore, the process of transformation and renewal of the mind by the word of God is blocked, even though the client believes that he has actually presented his body as a living sacrifice. (Romans 12: 1-2). His sacrifice was not holy because of his own self deception. Renewing of the mind is not just an intellectual process but it is also an emotional experience. In other words, the insights that he receives about himself ought to be felt in his gut or belly.When all things have truly become new in salvation, the believer who has remained bound in various areas of life may respond to insights or truths about himself in un-expected ways. Just as a going for a 30 minute outdoor swim may be refreshing and invigorating to some, it may be exhausting and even fearful to others, depending upon the intensity of the sun, the temperature of the water and also upon the physical condition of the person.
The Impact of Truth
Similarly, a nugget of truth may be extremely painful or it may immediately bring joy, exhilaration or relief. If received as pain, the captive may feel that the insight is a threat. He might also perceive the insight as “opening a can of worms”, and thereby become discouraged or depressed because he perceives that he is facing too many changes, too soon.
As a pre-deliverance counselor, your stance should be that of the Savior’s. Jesus Christ declared that once truth is known, it will set one free. Yet He did not guarantee that the price of freedom would not be painful. Even so, for both the Narc and his victim to become free to express who each of them really is, relieved from having to repress their emotions for so long, I believe that the pain is worth it. Even if the insight or revelation received is not flattering, the truth will remove the tensions generated by the their former tendency to hide or to deny their true feelings.
Furthermore, knowing that demons have been secretly manifesting their own thoughts and ways into the captive’s soul can serve as the catalyst for change and a call to action. For example, once a captive discovers that his hostility toward others was demonically inspired, the counselor or can then prepare to know he can be in Christ Jesus and can then guide him to “put on the whole armor of Christ,” once the Holy Spirit calls him or her to salvation.
Pam Sheppard Publishing of PMS offers courses and books were designed to work with mental health disorders from a spiritual perspective. Also. there are two books that you need: Faces of the Religious Demon: Freedom Through Deliverance Counseling and The Church of the End-time Zombies: A Guide to Religious Detox